Irish Stew , Aliens and the State of the Nation
Many parents are convinced their teenagers are aliens, switched at birth and barely recognisable as part of the human species. But no , they are all ours…for better or worse, in sickness and health, till mess do us part ! Ireland as a country is also seen as a mother figure. Known as Caitlin Ni Houlihan, her maternal presence is almost omnipotent and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that for the foreseeable future it’s a case of “Irish Stew”!
Today Caitlin is in her kitchen and it’s in an awful mess! Coincidence or what? So is the rest of the house. The baby is in the high chair happy as Larry .In come the 3 kids on donkeys. That’s a tight squeeze, but they managed it.
- If Ireland was a women – Caitlin Ni Houlihan
“What’s for dinner Mammy” says the first lad.
“Irish Stew” Comes the tired response.
“Ah mammy!, He moans, we’ve had nothing but Irish Stew for the last few years. Haven’t I told you over and over again, it’s time for a change? I’ve sat on the fence and hurled on the ditch long enough to know you could be doing much better! How about fishing in troubled waters-the hotter the better- and the odd pickle wouldn’t go amiss either? Get up of your knees and go out and sort it, and by the way…how in god’s name can you cook on your knees?”
His sister was lying slumped over her donkey, fast asleep in her best going out pyjamas.
“Will you wake up and give mammy a hand” he rants again ” I’ve had a hard day carrying the rest of the shirkers like you.”
She opens one eye (two was too much effort) and says “What’s in it for me?”
“Your free dinner” he retorts.
“Lift me off the donkey and I might” she said. He starts tearing his hair out.
The third brother (always the cutest and wisest according to tradition) looked upon his mother’s worn and weary face. He looked around at the mess which he knew in his heart he had contributed to, and felt huge remorse.
He looked at his brother and said, “You are a worker and a leader…but what we need now is Resolution not Revolution. Lead by example and we will follow.”
He turned to his sister and said “All your life you have been spoiled. You have taken everything and given nothing .Why not make today and all your tomorrows, your giving days?”
He looked at his mother and said “I have been a wheeler and dealer myself over the years, and there are things I am not proud of. We all have to take responsibility, you included mother. You turned a blind eye to our failings and would not listen when others pointed them out.”
She nodded sadly.
He looked at the baby ( still gurgling happily in his chair) “Nothing changes until something changes” he said.” We can do this together…are ye with me or not?”
And they all got up off their asses and swallowed the Irish Stew…their mammy was fierce proud!
